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COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS - A Threat to Emotional Wellness



Consider this: If you compared other people’s strength to your own limitations, what do you think the result would be? Do you think it’d be fun or enjoyable?


We can't dispute that such comparison can inspire you to do better or even improve yourself on occasion, but this is a rare occurrence. Because this can create a decline in self-esteem in some people, which can lead to jealousy and toxicity. This will undoubtedly have a negative impact on one’s emotional well -being.


UNDERLYING CAUSE FOR COMPARING

When you compare yourself to others, you may feel inferior due to the possessions others have that you do not. You have a proclivity to be concerned with what other people think of you. Comparing yourself to others, on the other hand, is linked to feelings of sadness, self-blame, and melancholy.


In most cases, we have been comparing ourselves to others for a long time without even realizing it. However, a problem arises when we start focusing on others and the highlights of their life, vocations, appearances, and even their success and achievements.


As a result, constant comparing distances us from people with whom we have had long-term relationships. In doing so, we are putting our relationship, confidence, happiness, and, in the long term, our emotional health at danger.


IS THERE A CATEGORY FOR COMPARING ONESELF TO OTHERS?

When you compare yourself to others, you are setting yourself up for disappointment. It will also make you resent the people you compare yourself to. It has nothing to do with you why they are who they are.


We can compare ourselves to others in two ways when it comes to performance measures.

Upward comparison is when we compare ourselves to those who are better than we are. On the other hand, comparing ourselves to individuals who are worse than ourselves is a form of downward comparison.


HOW DOES COMPARING HARM YOU?

It's a fact that unconsciously, we all compare ourselves to others. It could be at school, work, or even in social situations. Even if our relationship is doing well, we also take time to compare it to our friends' or even public figures.


But the problem arises when you compare yourself harshly, which causes you to see yourself in a negative light. Or even worse, when you focus your energy on bringing other people down instead of lifting yourselves up.


Furthermore, comparing oneself to others is especially detrimental when you first begin to compete. It causes you to be dissatisfied with yourself and your life. Then comes a bitterness over the situation and surroundings.

If in any of this sounds familiar , you are not alone. Lets talk about ways we can overcome comparing ourselves to others.


REALISTIC SOLUTIONS NOT TO COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS

  • Remember you are unique. There is and will never be anyone else like you. God made you an original not a carbon copy.

  • Your timing for success will not be measured by what or the timing of your peer's successes/failures. Your success will be measured by your own willingness to learn, excel, change, and persevere through obstacles.

  • Never say never. Your dream is possible if you believe in it and are willing to work hard to obtain it.

  • You are good enough..."You will win if you don't quit" (TD. Jakes)

  • As Theodore Roosevelt once put it, "Comparison is the thief of pleasure." Transgress against the cycle of comparing yourself to others by reducing your feelings of insecurity, jealousy, and unhappiness. Make the best of what you've got instead. Stop worrying about what other people might say about you and start being grateful for all of your blessings.